Why adults have extramarital affairs?
Talk about a loaded matter that no one wants to talk about, this is it. Amusing thing, married dating have been going on ever since the beginning of the world. Extramarital relationships can be fraught with evils, cause sorrow, and other problems. Also you must wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and openness matter, money, age dissimilarity, faith upbringing, remorse, and on and on. I anticipate there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this post I should identify an affair as a long term, maybe years long relationship of a sexual nature between two individuals of whom one or both are married to other wives/husbands, married woman looking for dating married men.
Why do married people have extramarital affairs? There are as many answers as there are men seeking an affair. I suppose mainly though it is only the human condition, the need for love, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and appreciated. Here are a several reasons I have run across.
Naturally we as human beings are all sexual beings. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasant and exciting, and sex makes us escape the real world for a short period of time. This excitement exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Someone are able to turn the craving on and off, some are excellent at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and old, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the exhilaration of the chase. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the love for another human being, for some it is the desire to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the whole romance thing. These needs and yearnings can be so strong they prevail over the taboos the world has erected against married dating. For many individuals the yearnings will beat their worries and make them risk the rage of not only their family, but society also. So why, what is the method?
Sex Addicts, probably some of us are. Sex is very pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of physically driven sex addicts and can find away to have an affair and not wound your relatives or anybody else? You would need to reduce the threat you are taking. If you have the attitude that a good affair is one that is beneficial to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I suppose this is the biggest cluster, very big actually. There are many couples whose marriage is over, except they are happy in the way they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your spouse but there is no romance. Then there are the children to look after. Your assets are so entangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to live jointly besides love and sex.
Bodily reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them completing the sex operation, at least not with their othere half. An extramarital affair occasionally solves the difficulty while keeping the marriage whole.
Avoidance, sadly this is a frequent reason I fear. One or the other, frequently the gentleman is sexually neglecting his woman for a number of reasons. As a man I truly am grateful to you guys neglecting your ladies and making them available to us guys of romance, making them “lonely wives” But I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Then there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just missing in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Maybe its romance that is missing, maybe it is a shortage of love, could be caring is gone, could be it is the closeness, maybe neglect. Maybe we have simply grown distantly, our general interests diverged. Could be it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is diverce of what you want. Maybe I simply don’t know what I want from the marriage anymore. Could be, just maybe I miss that emotion that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The first reason people give is, they seek the passion that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to escape, for economic gain, for vengeance and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair